Manifesting Your Misery

Posted by Angela Gallo on

It seems like “manifestation” is such a buzzword right now and there are people from both sides having arguments that don’t need to be had. But listen up people, manifesting is not something that is up for debate. It’s actually just a fact. What are you creating in your reality? I want you to just sit within yourself and think for a second, “What are all the shit things in my life that I am attracting?” Just as easily as you can manifest good things in your life, you can sit and wallow in the filth and the lies and the excuses, and keep yourself stuck in a place you do not wish to me. You can manifest the good and the bad.

You need to understand that there is so much happening in you and around you at all times. You are a fucking living black hole, and whether you use that voracious and that vitality to attract everything you want or everything you don’t want. That magnetism is not up for debate. It’s a fact.

Humans have made self-sabotage their unique art form and it’s a tragedy. Don’t keep yourself stuck, complaining, cynical and unwilling to try new things. Don’t manifest your own misery. 


Angel Phoenix Arsenal: If you are a person who does not believe in manifesting, if you are somebody who is very quick to undermine manifesting as a woo-woo idea, I cannot stand the use of that word, by the way, if you are somebody who looks at the rules of attraction as nothing but a crock of shit or is really quick to judge, this message is for you. I want you to hear me really, really, really loud and clear when I say this. You are not smarter than your bodily intelligence and thank fuck or we would have gone extinct a long time ago.

If your body started listening to your head, we would never have survived this long. You are not more intelligent than biochemistry or physics or the magnetic fields surrounding your body. You are not more clever than the etheric fields, the channels, every goddamn thing that is moving through you and around you at any time of the day, any second of every day. You are not smarter than the cosmos, you are not smarter than the ocean floor, you are not smarter than anything else around you. You are not smarter than divine timing. You are not smarter than any of those things.

Manifesting is not something that is up for debate. It's actually just a fact. If you're one of those people, I want you to really just sit within yourself and just think about, "Okay, what are all of the shit things in my life that I am attracting?" That's the part where I tend to perhaps confront and upset the people that I speak to because cognitive distortion, addiction to our struggles, complete addiction to martyrdom and our sufferings, our obsession with victimhood as an identity, our obsessiveness with repeating patterns, not breaking habits is all a form of manifesting. You need to understand that there is so much happening in you and around you at all time. Within that is an interweaving, a cauldron, things that are being put together and taken apart at any second. You are a fucking living black hole.

Whether you use that voraciousness and that vitality to attract everything it is you want, or attract everything it is you don't want, baby that is up to you. That is not up to me. See, that magnetism is not up for debate. It's a fact. You can look at anybody who speaks around this. Joe Dispenza would be one who's become mainstream, he's fucking great. Go watch his stuff. We know for a fact that when we're operating in a place of cohesion, intelligence, body intelligence, intention. When everything is slotted into place, we actually create a catchment area around us, meters long, meters wide. We either bring in everything it is we want, or we push it so far away because all we're doing, like a crossguard, is calling in everything we don't want because of that self-sabotage that we have created. We've turned into an art. This is a fact.

Humans have literally made self-sabotage their art form. That is tragedy. That's like Dumbledore deciding that he would turn into Voldemort instead of being Dumbledore. It's you knowing what your power is, knowing what's capable, what you could possibly do, but instead choosing to call everybody else around you crazy or full of shit, or a liar, or absolutely nuts or whatever it is you want to say, instead of looking within yourself and saying, "Okay, cool. If they're actually saying this and they're attracting everything it is they want in their life, therefore, the reality is totally correlated to what it is they're theorizing, why not just sit the fuck back a second, and swallow your words, and perhaps try something new?"

Where is our willingness to be wrong about everything? Why would you want to be right about life-sucking? Why would you want to be right about being a victim? Why would you want to be right about, "There is no hope in my life to do any of the things I want to do"? Why? Who the fuck wants to be right about that? When you do make that your affirmation, you're just proving me right because with that thought alone, you become a magnet for diarrhea. That's what you become a magnet for.

You are instead choosing to use all that energy that you're shitting out to call in diarrhea, like a giant walking enema on steroids, instead of being like, "Okay, sick, how can I really work in alignment? What is my body telling me to do? What feels good? Where do I need to go? What do I need to pay attention to? What do I want in my life? Where am I compromising on those desires? Where am I failing to assert my boundaries? What aspect of my life am I lying to myself and to everyone?" Go there.

When you actually take the time to just excavate, self-excavate, stop debating. Stop debating. What a waste of time. You die tomorrow, and what did you do? Waste your whole life debating. Sit within yourself, acknowledge the love and the capacity that you have to do good for yourself and for the world and acknowledge the capacity you have to do bad to yourself and bad to the world and make that call.

If you don't make that call, ain't nobody going to make that call for you. It's just not going to work. We could sit and we could debate, but I'm not going to debate it because it's fact to me, and to the billions of people who are operating like this every single day, who are the cause of this paradigm shift and who will continue to be the baton holders and the baton passers to whatever comes next. In what world do we believe that cynicism and victimhood and negativity is the way of the future? If you look at everything in the world right now, that's wrong. Everything that makes us uncomfortable, everything that makes us sad, everything that makes us angry, every injustice, every inadequacy, every inequity, look at it all. What in the world makes you believe that cynicism is the antidote to all of the things that frustrate you? If you feel bad, in what world do you believe that feeling bad is the solution to feeling bad? How? It is not going to work. It makes me sad to continuously day-to-day have to have these conversations that are excruciatingly simple, is that you are what you think up in here and the words that you speak, they will create your reality.

The energy that you let into your body, that you play with, that you stay stuck in, that will absolutely create a castle or create the old, creaky ass fort with the moat around it that separates that-ness from their-ness, and again, that's your call. This is why we are stuck. We are trying to literally right a wrong with a wrong. Magic, literally the definition of magic is the medicine of self. It is what we are able to alchemize with words and intention, that's it.

I do it every single day. Every second of every single day I'm using my energy, my intention, my words, everything. I am the maestro of my world and this is not about any conversations that will lead to political correctness around privilege or gaslighting or anything else. This is just a fact. If you are in a place where you feel like garbage, you will imprison yourself in your mind. You will stay stuck there unless you liberate yourself.

This is why when you look at social experiments and they take people and they put them in prison cells, the prisoners who literally practice mindset, narrative, inner dialogue in a four by four room will walk out of that place unscathed. Physically fucked but unscathed. Resilience in that alchemy. You take the other person, the other prisoner who is in that padded room who has no control over what it is they think, and the worst prison is the one in their mind, not in the one around them. That is the fact.

Your worst enemy is yourself. Your worst critic is yourself. Therefore, the only person holding the key to the prison where you have created a padlock for, where you have swallowed that key for, the only person that can help you out of that is you. If you keep waiting for somehow your life to get better by believing that feeling like garbage day in and day out is going to be the thing that you need to escape that, it will never happen. You'll be forever waiting for somebody to rescue you, to make life better for you, to give you an opportunity. That will not happen.

How absurd to go from victimhood and cynicism to dependence and co-dependence and reliance and a completely toxic scenario where you convince yourself that the only reason you're alive is for that person, so you move from one toxic scenario to the next toxic scenario. Believe me when I say that you are creating realities and you are perpetuating patterns in your life because you are manifesting it.

Do you know anybody who just seems to attract drama, like every time you speak to them something is happening? Do you have those friends or people in your family where it's so weird because it's almost like they repeat the same thing over and over and over again, you're like, "What the fuck?" They attract the same lovers, they attract the same relationships. This is the psychology of our cognitive distortion. That is the psychology of our addiction to our sufferings because we are so much more likely to repeat our suffering, to stay stuck in our misery because the misery part is known. The misery part feels comfortable, and so our self-sabotage is so clever that it actually intentionally pulls in scenarios that will make us feel comfortable. Not happy, comfortable.

"If I just attract all of this shit, it's my identity," so you start manifesting things that perpetuate your identity, that perpetuate whatever it is you feel comfortable with, that perpetuate that discomfort because it is known. It's like people who walk to the park every day, they walk to the same park. There are 1000 parks near their house but they choose that park and they only go to that park. There are 1000 cafes, they only go to that one cafe every single day.

They have no idea what is lying on the outside of everything, but they keep doing that thing. I was in the scenario. We all do this. It took me a year and a half of really going within myself and recognizing my patterns, my habits, my behaviours, what I was attracting, what I was trying to break away from, what I was trying to invent for myself deep into reflection, and then seeking out contrast experiences, the opposite of what it is. I knew to then build what it is I want to have.

This can only happen if you, again, which is another conversation, if you put the effort into creating alternative experiences. If you do not choose to chase what feels good within your body, you never ever ever ever will get to what it is you want to be, because you think that that's all you deserve. That's all you can get, that's all you can have, therefore you simply stay stuck in that place and you will manifest this reality.

Really the topic of today, the first part is if you're a person who does not believe in manifesting, I'm telling you right now, look at the things in your life that you are attracting that make you miserable. If you're a first-time listener right now, if you're somebody who has not looked at the other aspects of my work, everything I do is about self. Being seen, being expressed, being liberated in your living, not just in life, and then being free from your fears by giving free rein to your fears.

In this, the basis of it all is self-love, self-ownership, and self-actualization. Until you know your power and what it does to be bad, bad, bad, bad, and bring in what is shit, shit, shit, shit, and then you make a very conscious effort into building and fucking obliterating, wrecking ball style, that foundation to rebuild the self-love and the self-ownership and the self-actualization. Then you start to use the compass, the barometer, the thermometer in your body to seek out the good things you'll never know. Do not sit on the high horse of the high stable and call people crazy because they know within their body what they are creating. I am not lucky, I am creating my reality.

I am creating my reality and I will not and refuse to live in a world or participate in conversations where we convince ourselves that, "That's not how life works, it's not that easy. You're just speaking from a place of privilege," et cetera. Do you know what's frustrating to me? Do you know how many people have created something from nothing? Every idol you have, every visionary, every person who's invented something, every fucking one of those people will tell you the same story, that they started from the bottom, now we're here. None of those people started with anything at all. All of those people started with hardship. All of those fucking people started with nothing.

It is in that desperation that they decided to say, "What if I'm wrong about everything? Why don't I try something new? Why don't I let my true self take the reins here?" What happens when you make that active decision and what you seek out?

If you are here right now in your health and you're able to have this conversation and you're able to listen to me, then you have the power to just sit within yourself and start thinking about where you're at and how you feel, where it is you want to go and how it is you want to feel. It is so obvious to me what the potential of humanity is. Not one ounce of this is meant to be condescending, patronizing, patriarchal, not at all. It is meant to liberate your mind, so therefore we can collectively work towards liberating society. Your victimhood, your cynicism, and your toxicity are actually complicit in the perpetuation of a society and a model in a system that is like, "You must be compliant. You must follow the rules. You must be exhausted. You must be productive." No. That's not going to work for me. I will choose, which means that really, truly my philosophy, this doesn't need to be your philosophy, this is mine.

My philosophy is I will do whatever it is I need to do, to feel the way that I want to feel. I will do whatever it is that I want to do, to build, create, manifest, attract the things that I want that I don't even know I want yet that I need and that I don't even know I need yet. By extension, I will teach my children how to do this. What is responsible intake of energy? What is irresponsible projection of energy? At all times what are you doing to work with your ebb and your flow and your soul?

Your words, what language are you using to write your reality? If you don't know it's scripting is, fucking hell. I suggest that you get on that boat. Scripting will allow you an opportunity to start recognizing what your mind does, how it thinks, and when you take a stocktake of that inventory and those thoughts and you start to realize how often you say, "I can't do this, I won't do that, I wish I could do that," and you start to script it, which means the literal writing of your thoughts and what reality you want to create, you will notice that you are your own worst enemy.

Scripting is the idea of what would it be and what would it mean and what could it create if I got a piece of paper right now and a pen, not a computer and I just said, "I am going to be so explicit with my word choice and I'm going to write down exactly what it is I want, who it is I want to be, and I'm going to get theatrical, man, I'm going to get gregarious. I'm going to let this be luscious and layered and I'm going to make sure that everything I write down on this sets a foundation and creates a precedent for whatever asked for next." You watch what happens.

You watch what you attract into your life, but you know what the worst part is? People, you know how powerful you are and you're so scared of being seen and you're so scared of actually getting the success and you are so terrified of what it would mean if you would actually be happy and what it would feel like if you've got everything you want. It scares the fuck out of you. You're so scared of what it would feel like if you could really truly look within yourself and say, "I love myself. I love myself." You're so terrified of all of those realities that you intentionally cock-block yourself.

You intentionally choose language that is the opposite. You intentionally curate a reality that makes you unhappy because you don't know what you'll do with yourself. If you get everything it is you want. You truly have no idea as to what you would do. What would my identity be? Who would I be if I didn't have all of these things? My loves, if you can't even think for yourself, desire for yourself, if you can't even dream for yourself, who the fuck is going to rescue you? There is nobody on this planet that is going to want more for you and do more for you and create more for you than you can for yourself. Nobody, nobody, nobody.

You can get teachers, you can get coaches, you can get lovers, you can get anything you want, but the power from the alchemy, the medicine of self, what happens here is you are the magnet. When somebody else creates it for you, they are simply the provider and the enabler, the butler, the whatever the fuck it is you want to call it. It's like wanting a car and only wanting that car if you sit in the passenger seat. No, no, no. It doesn't work like that. You have to be the driver in this experience.

Secondly, when it comes to the matter of gaslighting, when it comes to the matter of white supremacy, internalized racism, continuously checking in with the ways that you are speaking, cultural appropriation, et cetera, I need everybody to hear me and hear me hard right now. If you have a person around you, white, black, Asian, person of culture, doesn't matter, anybody, if you hear any of those people discuss their inner medicine, their spirituality with you and you make comments about it being crazy, shitty, bunch of crock of shit, you don't believe it, you are quick to judge, you criticize because it's a white person participating, I need you to understand something.

Every kind of magic you can imagine in the world started with our ancestors and indigenous people wherever they might be. White, black, caucasian, Asian, everywhere, everywhere. Whether it's Santeria, Stregheria, truly, just Google it. When you talk shit about somebody who is using some medium to explore their spirituality, please understand that I'm begging you to check in with that because it is absolutely coming from a place of fucking colonization, racism, bigotry, all of those things.

Those are the exact people that killed our ancestors because they practice those things they practised and every time you are talking badly about somebody who does magic when we know, for example, that there are people of colour and culture who right now are participating in beautiful voodoo, conjuring and magic of all sorts, you cannot participate in anti-racism conversation when it convenes you. You cannot participate in the anti-racist conversation when it is okay for you. You cannot be a person of colour culture who is speaking badly about magic and about expression and about mediumship and about channelling and about tarot reading and about herbal lore, about all of those things.

When your own ancestors participated in it or when right now people are still being killed for being witches, it is a very strange thing that I'm noticing here and it's the same reason that we wear wich costumes at Halloween and we think it's okay. Even though for 300 years, literally hundreds of thousands of people were killed. It's not normal that we are wearing costumes that make a mockery and make satire out of the total genocide and gendercide of literally one of the most barbaric times in history where people are still dying because of this. It really, really concerns me.

As more people on the internet start to safely want to discuss their gifts, I need you to consider the fact that this is not someone who's like, "Cool, I'm just doing a few magic tricks. I want to look trendy." This is fucking deep, deep inner medicine. This is deep paradigm-shifting. This is the stuff that takes us back to our roots, back to our ancestry, and that brings us all together. I saw the Frozen 2 movie and I cried the whole time, the whole time. I was like, I feel so lucky right now that it is 2019, and there was a Disney movie and it gives me goosebumps because I sobbed the whole time. I also laughed because it was hilarious.

God, I love all that, but that there was a movie, a Disney movie that was literally about following the voices in your head, going to your insights, challenging the patriarchy, understanding and knowing colonization, the extermination of aboriginal, indigenous and native people. Going back to that matriarchal connectedness, that masculine, that feminine, at that point, my God, it was so fucking beautiful. Even the conversation between the natives and the white people and realizing that this is something we have to do together, fighting each other over things all the time is not going to make things better.

Fighting each other all the time because your activism is not good enough, you're a quack, you're full of shit. It's not going to make things better. Everything in that movie was so beautifully presented, particularly when Elsa was looking at that flashback and she saw the native elder leader and the fucking asshole who killed him. Right before that, he was saying like, "We cannot let these people and their power know that they're powerful because that would mean there's too much power there and they would--" Elsa steps in and says, "That is not true. You are making up lies about what you don't understand and what you are scared of."

I thought, what a lesson? What a lesson to teach our children about misunderstanding and how the fear in that is enough to start wars. How, if you're going to participate in conversations online, please for the love of God, stop fighting the people that are trying to be present and whole and ethical and moral who want things to change. Stop participating in conversations about trying to fucking fight the person on the other side. I really need you to understand that as a white woman coming to this conversation, it's really difficult for me because it's difficult for me in the sense where I'm super fucking aware of the precariousness of the situation, but it makes me really sad when we talk about magic and medicine of self and urbanism and I mean there's so many things, elemental magic, all of the ways that we literally look at this because it's the one fucking original religion that ties every community, every culture, every colour of skin, man, every language and we are quick to understand, so quick to fucking- like, "Nah, fuck it."

Do you think it's a coincidence that all of you hate these things or don't believe it? No, because it's the one language that if we stopped to really speak, stopped to really listen to, we could all communicate, we could all speak the same language, but instead we're more invested in saying that universal language is fake. It's not real. It's a lie. It's crazy. Every time you speak badly about medicine of self, you are absolutely participating in something that is going to continue to kill people and keep them stigmatized or you can make a choice in that moment to really think about, "Okay, if there have been people practising this since the beginning of time in every culture, maybe the ultimate way that I can check in with my internalized racism, the ultimate way that I can even check-in as a person of colour and a person of culture and think about how I engage in conversations about this."

It is so fucking important. We're talking about body intelligence, animals, babies, sentiency, it's about our blood. What does my blood look like and what does your blood look like? That's intelligence That changes the world. That's compassion, that's connection. That is conviction that changes the world. The longer that we stay stuck in our heads discussing who's right and who's wrong and who sounds more politically correct and who's not doing enough, the more we stay in the head type of activism, the longer we stay away from the body type of activism.

You don't change the world unless you change yourself. We are living on a planet in the middle of the fucking galaxies, universe, space, wherever it is we are. If we were one degree to the left or one degree to the right, we would freeze our tits off and die or burn our fucking balls off and die. We are so lucky to be alive on a planet that is this patient with us. We are so lucky to be here together and at what point do we realize that this is "live together, die alone," and what point do we realize that we are literally so powerful, so attuned, so capable that we are sitting on top of technology, of awareness, of everything it is that we need to save this planet and participate in something?

When are we going to figure that out? How long was it going to take for us to stop fighting each other? Do you realize it's like soldiers and they're all on the same side and before they can even get to the front line of that battle, they've killed each other? They've all killed each other before they even get to the fight they have to fight. That is fucking tragic. It makes me cry all the time. Never have we had something like this. You could have your own TV show, you can get on the internet. There's never been a safer time to be who it is you are and you're trying to be people about the power and the legitimacy of inner knowing, inner truth, manifesting self-actualization, creating our realities because-- Why? We have a point to prove?

The more powerless you stay, the less power you will have to help other people who definitely are fucked right now because of all of the things, disparity. The longer you stay stuck here, the fewer people you help there and this is not coming from a patronizing way. It's understanding what are you participating in? Is it helping us move forward or is it keeping us five steps backward? Are the conversations you are participating in actually perpetuating that culture and that climate and bringing it back to the people who are trying to bring back ritual and practice, instinct, intuition, inner knowing. Guys, this is not a crock of shit. There's nothing trendy about instinct or intuition or manifestation.

If you're one of those people, great, it worked. The government got everything they wanted, man, society, patriarchy, everyone, they all got it right. Every fucking ounce of that play, they had you puppeting. That's exactly what they want you to be so far removed from because if each one of us was tapped into ritual and connection and community and instinct and intuition, everybody oppressing us would literally stand no chance.

These are gifts within us that we are literally equipped with, born with and our body intelligence is so clever that even though we talk away this level of power, it lingers and it waits. It just waits like an orgasm being edged, begging to come undone. It's fucking waiting for your whole life. It's just there. It's there and it's itching and at a certain point, you make the decision whether you're going to keep being cynical or you're going to tap into the things that absolutely will make you feel powerful. That's it. Hear me when I say this. There are two types of teachers in this world. There are two types of leaders. There are two types of people that you can look up to learn from, to be guided from and to be inspired from.

One is the kind who will tell you everything it is that you want to hear. They might salt and pepper it with just enough spiciness to make you believe that they are actively participating, but they tell you everything it is that you want to hear and they give you an A+ and they give you a high -five and they say, "Great job, you're not quite there yet, but great job. I'll see you next week."

They're the kind of people who want you to feel like you're doing something and they know that. They're smart because you are literally just looking for a teacher who's going to make you feel like you're putting in the effort so that you can self-righteously, arrogantly and egotistically feel like you're participating in some level of personal change evolution. There are so many people right now who teach this way, who coach this way, who mentor this way, who lead the world this way.

Then there are people who will not tell you what it is you want to hear and they confront you, not for any other reason other than they're telling you the opposite of what it is you want to hear. Not because what you think is not the right answer or wrong, but because they don't believe in wrong or right. They believe in inner truth and they believe that a derailing from an innerness and an obsession on an outerness will never take you to where it is you want to be.

The kind of teachers that say, "Listen, this is what the answer is. Is this taking you closer to your goals or further away from your goals?" That's it. Hayley said to me, "Ang, Haley Carr, is it a hell yes or is it a hell no? There's no grey zone. There's no maybe." When she told me these things and when she let me really understand that all I had to do was allow myself to be confronted and it is only in those confrontations that I could meet the opposite of who it is I am to attract the opposite of what it is I want, that's the kind of teacher that I want to be. That's who I want to emulate.

An energy that is not saying, "I want better from you because I think you're shit. I'm asking you for better because I know and I see and I taste your potential and there's nothing else that I want in this world than for you to express the outer edges of your potential to push even beyond that, to be continuously operating, creating, living and breathing from a place that feels alive." You need to carefully choose the people in your life that you are counting on to teach you. If you are a person who is riddled with shame and guilt bias, who is continuously triggered, who is absolutely not in a place that they want to be on or in rather, and you are only looking for teachers and coaches and mentors or even people on Instagram that you follow just so that you can get that little hit that affirms your bullshit, you're never going to get to where it is you want to be. I say this a lot, guys, but 9 out of 10 people who work with me unfollowed me three, four times. But they kept coming back because they realized that there is something that is pissing them off, that they need to be paying attention to, that wherever it is they are triggered is an indication that there is a wounding that is begging to be healed. All I am doing is speaking to something that makes you feel like scratching your scab.

There is something festering underneath that brokenness. Whatever it is that is underneath that is what I want to see. We could put band-aids on it, you could get it stitched up, I could give you some meds. Hey, you wouldn't even know that it was there. You might call it a day. That's not what I want. If you're going to learn with someone, if you're going to seek out someone to teach you, please trust me when I tell you do not go and look for education, inspiration, information and insight that is just going to keep you where you already are. Don't.

It's like a narcissist looking for a lover who's an empath so that they can continuously leech off of them. An empath who's addicted to narcissistic lovers looking for that narcissistic lover so that they can keep being stuck in that victimhood so that they can keep looking to save people. Superheroes would not exist without supervillains. Supervillains are addicted to superheroes as superheroes are to supervillains. We are in a society that is literally superheroes and supervillains.

Charles Eisenstein speaks about this. We are living in a world right now where it's like, "I'm right. You're wrong. I'm holy, you're profane." Instead of realizing that the superhero could not exist if the villain didn't exist, and the villain would have nothing to do if he had nobody to fight. I believe in a world where we are all inherently heroic. I believe in a world where it is every heretic that is the hero. This is exactly why heresy is a word that I want to reclaim. We all have the ability to travel the hero and heroine's journey which is directly related to how we start manifesting, to how we learn our inner magic.

You do not get to meet who it is you are until you are ready to leave everything it is you have and are behind. You do not get everything you want by staying put. You do not get everything it is you want by staying in a place that feels easy, that is routine, that is habitual. It doesn't work like that. In fact, the most entitled thing that you could possibly do is believe that by simply being a nice person and paying your mortgage on time, and having a retirement fund and being a good parent, that you somehow have everything owed to you. This is not how it works.

We all fetishize the hero or the heroine, even though all this heroine writing has been obliterated, please go read Valerie Frankel's work. She's written like 100 books on this. We all fetishize comics, heroes, and heroines because we are quite literally looking at something as Erica says, "You spot it, I got it." If you're recognizing something in a superhero or superheroine, they are like, [gasps] let me tell you, spoiler alert, it's because you know that thing is within you.

Instead, what we do is we fetishize over this dark and light play. We fetishize over what it would mean if we were really powerful, or what it would mean if we were really evil and we never allow ourselves to actually go into that place that repeats itself throughout history, which is literally step-by-step, you can go read about it, how you leave, where you go, who you meet along the way. Let me tell you, when you get to the mentor spot, when you get to that mentor spot, when you find that person who's going to teach you the lesson that you need to learn before you can return, as this new and revamped version, that teacher and that mentor is never sunshine and daisies.

By the way, every time you read about a mentor or a teacher, they literally have that Athena archetype. The wicked stepmother, the bitchy this person, blah, blah, blah, you're always needing somebody who confronts you in order for you to see some part of yourself that could not be accessed without that. If you spend your whole life literally avoiding going to the darkest parts of you, if you spend your whole life avoiding moving and you are so afraid and you stay put, you'll never be able to do whatever it is you want to do. It's not possible.

It's not you have to be alone. You've got to find friends in a community who gets you, and go and fucking get your scarecrow, your tin man, go and find your Toto. Go and do whatever it is you need to do. Go and find those red shoes. Go and do the damn thing so that you can find who it is you need to find so that you can realize that if you could just click your heels three times, that's it. You would get into your body and there's no place like home.

There's no place like home. There's no place like home. There's no place like home. This is home. Not that. This, this, me, myself and I and the friends you make along the way in the community you seek and the chances you take and the risks that you take and the way that you listen to the inner voice when it sounds crazy when the world is telling you that you're crazy. That's where you get to meet your magic. You do not get to discredit magic.

You do not get to discredit intuition and instinct and the power of what it is you are and who it is you are by talking shit about all those other people who are living in that place. You don't get to do that in the comfort of your own home when you have not taken any chances or any risks or said yes to the thing that scares the shit out of you. That is arrogance. There is nothing more privileged. There is nothing, no statement that will sound more like coming from a place of privilege than the person making a statement from a place that is complete fallacy in the complete derogatory way to another person who has nothing, and who wants to create something out of nothing and you are a person who has created something out of something in your brain, that's fucking privilege to me.

If you are somebody who has created something out of something that has nothing to do with magic and you're sitting there and you're saying, "Fuck this, this is not right. This is blah, blah, blah," you're literally speaking from a place of privilege because the other person or the people around you who have nothing, and who have to make something, listen to me, the people around you who have no choice, but to make something out of nothing will require magic. There is no other way that you can turn fucking wine from water, or fish from bread, or anything else that you want to do to feed yourself and feed the world unless you have magic.

You want to change the world? You better have magic. You want to fucking shake up the game? You better be in touch with your fucking instinct and your intuition, all the damn things. When you sit from the outside of that, and you get yourself a job where you don't or whatever the fuck it is you want to do, and you talk shit about those who literally have no other choice, but to create something out of nothing and you say magic is not real, that is fucking privilege in full motion. That's what it is.

Do not make harsh or key observations about what other people are doing. Do not fetishize the potential of what it is we could be, do not make satire and mockery of the ways that we have genocide, gendercide. Medicine of self. Do not participate in the ways that the first thing that was colonized, by the way, is our bodies, and our inner knowing, and everything it is that we are. That's the first thing that was colonized to make us babymakers and fuck dolls and everything else in between. Don't participate in conversations.

Before you say something, let it sit in your mouth. Keep it there for 30 seconds. Ask yourself, "Is what I'm about to say, going to affect, going to piss someone off, going to hurt someone, going to impact somebody else?" You'll see, you'll go on a huge- like, "Okay, these are the thousand ways it could go wrong." If it feels wrong, don't fucking say it, swallow it. That's it.

If you listened to this today, and you want to perhaps try something new, look for a teacher who is actually going to confront you, on your hero or heroine's journey. The hero and the heroine do not get to meet the face of their true potential and integrate all parts of their self that they have scattered. As you know, I like to say Horcruxes until they meet the person who's going to teach them. That is just a fact. Comfortable, is not where your potential is. The last thing, our ego is so powerful. Our body, our energy is so powerful. I believe- there are lots of ways politically you could look at this, I honestly believe that we manifest it being in a fucking solar system, galaxy, Milky Way, a small portion of whatever is out there, I believe we manifested being alone because that's how egotistical we are. I really honestly believe that we are the ants to someone else's picnic. I believe that humans are so obsessed with destroying, colonizing, controlling, owning, we are so powerful, we're so oblivious to it, that we are literally in a scenario, we're here and until we learn our lesson, we can come back to the big and stable. That's what I honestly think.

I think that us being alone is a pure indication and a pure reflection, as is above is below, is that we are never going to be privy to connecting to other people or seeing anything, or being a part of a bigger conversation until we stop acting like toddlers who have not been loved to a place where they feel attached and emotionally secure and safe enough to be themselves. That's what I honestly think.

This planet, this poor planet has been through so much shit, it ain't even funny. Have you ever stopped to consider that maybe Venus named after women so aptly which is up in flames, which is literally almost exactly like earth but up in flames, that maybe that was Earth? Maybe Venus is intelligence with the fucking phoenix itself up into flames to literally preserve itself to whatever degree it could be, set itself on fire so that motherfuckers would just leave it alone.

We are powerful, but we only know what we know. I really honestly believe that our body, much like all the other amazing intelligent things that it does to protect us, et cetera, has cut us off from source until we have earned the right to go there. You only go to that place when you allow yourself to break down and then the breakthrough, when you really allow yourself to just be in that fucking place and say, "There are so many things that are not working right now. I don't need to be overwhelmed by all the things that need fixing. I'm not here to fix anything."

Trying to fix everything else is a distraction. How do I fix myself? Not because I am broken, because I'm distracted. How do I remember what it is I was before I forgot who it is I could be? That's all it's about. You're not broken. You're not crazy. You don't need permission, you don't need validation. What you need is some inner, inner work, inner reflection, innerness, not outerness. The problems that are in here, you will not find the solutions on the outside of your body, you won't. The problems here require here time.

I just did some channelling the other day and one of the things that I was challenging about was the ways that we pummel the instinct and intuition out of children. We do. We allow them to believe that imagination is wonderful before imagination means you're crazy and now you have to shut the fuck up and be a productive human. You're crazy if you explore anything.

Also, understand that imagination is 'imagi' which is ‘magic of the mind’. It is why in every book and in every movie, the person with the most imagination is ostracized like Willy Wonka, for example, who decides to surround himself with people who live in colour, why the best authors were recluses, why every visionary was killed, exiled, all the things. People with huge imagination like Tesla, where so much of what we have was because of Tesla. He lived and died, to be broke and alone in a hotel.

There are things that we do over and over again and one of those is literally laugh, and kill, and make a mockery of, and assault the people who are asking us to think differently. We literally made a religion of a man we murdered because he asked questions. You need to understand the irony and the fucked-up-ness of that, you need to do work and look into the ways that we are notoriously predictable and that if you're going to do something differently, and you're Christian or you're Catholic, for example, and you're literally reading a Bible about a guy who was murdered for asking questions and wanting more, and you are literally participating in conversations that belittle undermined assault, abuse, make fun of people who are asking questions, you are a part of the problem.

It's so important for us to start thinking about, what are we actually believing? What is our truth? Do we even know our truth? Are we looking for somebody else to give us the truth because we're so far removed from ourself? Disciplining your children is not disciplining. Discipline is social conditioning. Please be mindful of what you say to your children, how you speak to them, how you are around them.

If you want to train them, if you want to fucking do all these things-- I have 50 seconds left, I'm just concerned about the time. Discipline is in my opinion social conditioning. The moment a child actually starts to borderline without imagination can turn to magic and power, we squash it. Do not be those people who decide to make their children minions or little soldiers because if you try and soldier your children, they will live to fight others and be at war and at odds with themselves and the world. Teach your children how to make magic with their bodies and their minds and use their imagination and know their selves and that will change the world. That will change the world. Things need to change and it starts here. It starts here.

Share this post

← Older Post Newer Post →